-=DOMINANT'S CREED=-

"Above all else a Dom/me cherishes Their submissive, in the knowledge that the gift the submissive gives T/them is the greatest gift of all"

"A Dom/me is demanding and takes full advantage of the power given to T/them, but knows how to share the pleasure that comes from that precious gift."

"A Dom/me is in control of T/themselves first and foremost, so that T/they may control others. "

"As a stern and demanding Dom/me, T/they can cause T/their submissive to cry real tears. "

"As the consummate lover, T/they will then kiss the tears away, without stepping out of character."

"In times of trouble, a Dom/me will leave the roles behind, to be a supportive friend and partner, never forgetting that this is still a loving relationship between two caring individuals."

"A Dom/me is quick to understand the differences between fantasy and reality."

"A Dom/me would never asks a submissive to put T/them before their career, or family, just to satisfy T/their own pleasure."

"To win a submissive's mind, body, spirit, soul, and love, a Dom/me knows T/they must first win their trust."

"A Dom/me will show T/their submissive humour, kindness, and warmth."

"A Dom/me must always show them that T/their guidance and tutoring is knowledgeable and deserving of their attention, that this is a person they can learn from, and that they can trust T/their direction."

"A Dom/me is romantic enough to be protective and chivalrous. When called upon, T/they will fight for T/their submissive's honour."

"A Dom/me proves to their submissive that T/they are someone they can lean on, and depend on."

"When it comes time to teach T/their submissive their lessons of obedience, T/they are a strong and unyielding professor."

"A Dom/me will accept no flaw. Nothing less than perfection from T/their student."

"Never does a Dom/me use discipline without a good reason. When T/they do punish T/their submissive, it is always with a knowledgeable and careful hand."

"A Dom/me is always open to communication and discussion; always ready to hear T/their submissive's wants and needs."

"A Dom/me is patient; taking time to learn T/their submissive's limits, and knowing that as their trust of T/them grows, so will they."

"A Dom/me never has to demand ritual behavior from T/their submissive. T/their submissive responds to T/them out of the want of pleasing T/them. Compliance comes from the wanting to please, not the fear of punishment."

"A Dom/me understands the fragile nature of mind and body and never violates the trust given to T/them."

"A Dom/me is secure enough to laugh at T/themselves and the absurdities of life. Open minded enough to learn new things. Strong enough to grow."

"A Dom/me's tools are mind, body, spirit, soul, and love."

"A Dom/me understands that E/each partner gains most from pleasuring the O/other."

"And B/both of T/them know that love and trust are the only bindings that truly hold. "

-=The submissive's Creed=-

"I will communicate with complete honesty my needs, desires, limits, and experience. I realize that failing to do so will not only prevent my Top and I from from having the best experience possible, but can also lead to physical and emotional harm."

"I will not try to manipulate my Top. I will not push to make a scene go the way I feel it should. In other words, I will not top from the bottom."

"I will keep an open mind about trying things that I am not comfortable with and expanding my limits. I will continue to grow as a submissive and as a human being."

"I will accept the responsibility of discovering what pleases my Top, and will do my best to fufill their wishes and desires."

"I will not allow myself to be harmed or abused. I know that submissive does not equal doormat."

"I will be courteous and helpful to my fellow submissives. I will share my knowledge and experience with others in the hope that they will learn and benefit from where I have been. I will take the time to help those new to the scene start out on the correct path."

"I will be responsive to my Top. I will not try to hide what my mind and body are feeling so that I may assist them in their responsibilities as my authority. I know that Dominants are not telepaths, and will not expect my Top to know thoughts or feelings which I do not share."

"I will accept in the responsibility of a scene or relationship gone bad. I will not place total blame on my Top when it is not warranted simply because they are the Dominant. I realize that things may not work out as they should at times, and will do my best to put it behind me and move on."

"I will give my gift of submission only to those that can responsibly accept and desire to receive. I will not place anyone in the position of Topping me non-consensually, nor will I give my respect to someone that has not earned it."

"I will be obedient to my Top even if I disagree with what they are requesting. I realize they have my best interests at heart and often knows better than I what I need in a particular situation."

"I know that my actions reflect upon my Top, and will do my best to help others see them in a positive way. I will not intentionally embarrass or displease my Dominant."

"Above all, I will wear my title of submissive with honor. I will never cause others to think that being submissive means to be weak or sub-human. I will take pride in who and what I am and will never show myself in a negative way."

-=Ten Rules For Dominants=-

1. Be Patient
Until you enter into a relationship with a submissive, you have no more right to order him/her around than does anyone else. Give your bottom time to get to know you and what you are like. Finesse and subtlety are major elements of dominance. Similarly, strength and gentleness go hand in hand. The sensitivity and awareness (or lack thereof) that you show in the real world is likely to be repeated in the playroom.

2. Be Humble
You may be God's/Goddess' gift to the world, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunities to show how good you are - and plenty of opportunities to make a fool of yourself. No matter what you claim, the "real you" will show through in a scene. Don't set yourself up for a failure by developing expectations that you know you can never reach.

3. Be Open
Although the top is classically considered to be the teacher in D/s-SM, you can always learn from your bottom, no matter how inexperienced. Be willing to learn from other dominants who may have a totally different perspective from yours. Try to approach by-now-familiar trips with an attitude of wonderment and discovery. Be aware that everyone has her or his own personal style.

4. Communicate
You are responsible for finding out basic, essential information about the people you play with, such as experience, limits, likes and dislikes, and health information. Playing D/s-SM without this knowledge is like Russian roulette. Talk about your head-space and your view of D/s-SM with your bottom, so that any uncertainties can be dealt with before you start playing. Clearly spell out roles, rules, limits, and contracts. Do not take for granted that your bottom instinctively knows the ground rules.

5. Be Honest
If you lack experience in an area that your bottom would like to experiment with, be honest about it. Your partner has a right to know that. Be honest with yourself and take your submissive only to those levels at which you are completely in control of the situation. Safety should always be the first concern, taking priority over how hot a particular scene is.

6. Be Sensitive
There's a very fine line between a sensitive, caring dominant and a self-righteous, insensitive overbearing clod. Your scene should be a creative synthesis of your needs and fantasies and your bottom's needs and fantasies. Although, on the surface, your submissive is serving you, what actually is happening is that dominant and submissive are serving each other. Earn the complete trust of your submissive and never violate or even threaten to violate that trust. His or her submission is a gift to you. Use it appropriately.

7.Be Realistic
End the scene with the bottom wanting more, not wishing there had been less. Remember that power, control, and sensitivity are the keys, not just the intensity of the stimulation. Be clear about what is fantasy, and has little to do with what works in practice. Your favorite porno picture books may be stimulating in themselves, but don't try to imitate them to the last detail.

8.Be really Dominant
Submissives are looking for someone who will take over their body and mind, not just for brute strength. Real people are wanted, not just cardboard images from cigarette ads or macho stereotypes. Your dominance enhances your whole existence. It does not cover up or substitute for other areas of your life - it is you. Make your submissive fall in love with you, and expect him or her to give him/herself up to you totally. Follow up on rules, expect obedience, and punish appropriately when it is called for. Don't shirk your responsibility to your bottom or to your sister/fellow tops. Be dependable and expect dependability. You have agreed to take the dominant role - now take it!

9. Be Healthy
Like any strenuous activity, SM requires that its participants be in top physical and emotional health. Many factors, including the amount you sleep, your eating habits, and your alcohol and drug intake affect your performance and endurance during a scene. Don't attempt to do SM when your physical or emotional energy is low. As a dominant you have a special responsibility to be in control of yourself and on top of the scene. An attitude of "drugs and alcohol don't affect me that much... I can do it anyway" violates your submissive's trust in you and can be dangerous. If you don't want to accept the responsibilities, you shouldn't be playing the game!

10. Have Fun
After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned, and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasures which come from responsible, creative SM play.

-=Ten Rules For submissives=-

1. Be Patient
A potential top will let you know if she or he is interested in you or not. Keep in mind that your purpose as a submissive is to serve and to satisfy someone who will take into consideration the realization of your fantasies. Don't expect your top to be able to turn on like a light switch. The timing must be right for both of you.

2. Be Humble
You may be God's or Goddess' gift to the world and the most sought after prize in town, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunity to show how good you are. No matter what you claim, the "real you" will show through in a scene. Don't set yourself up for failure by developing expectations that you know youand your top can never reach.

3. Be Open
You can learn something about SM and about yourself from everyone into the scene, no matter how experienced or inexperienced they are, or how dominant or submissive they are. D/s- SM is a very personal art, and an "I already know it all" attitude will make you miss valuable SM lessons and experiences, and ignore potentially valuable D/s-SM friends.

4. Communicate
Verbalization is necessary, but at the appropriate time and in the appropriate way. Your top needs to know basic information about you, such as experiences, fantasies, health concerns, and turn-offs. But - unless it's an emergency - wait until your top asks. Don't expect your dominant to be a mind-reader who instinctively knows your needs, wants, and limits. Your cooperation will enhance the scene for both of you.

5. Be Honest
Don't be afraid to share your needs and fantasies. Your dominant expects it. Honesty about your wants, health concerns, and turn-offs is essential to a good scene. Lying or being less than candid can only lead to problems, as the top will base the scene on inaccurate information. Besides causing problems, it can be dangerous.

6. Be Vulnerable
Your scene is a two-way street. It is not just the physical realization of your prior fantasies. If you want to limit your experience to certain physical and psychological stimulation, then contract with your top ahead of time. But don't always expect your top to be a puppet in a fantasy play you've written in your head. It's far better to let your top surprise you, to extend your limits, to take you to places you're never been before. When you trust your top completely, let her or him know it, and let him or her guide you into new fantasies.

7.Be Realistic
Your dominant is human, and even the most experienced tops have moments of awkwardness and indecision. Don't call attention to what you perceive as a lapse. Know the difference between reality and the fantasy world you see in books and magazines. Few tops are rich enough to afford a large dungeon with a lavish layout of equipment. Your top's equipment is expensive - respect it and don't abuse it.

8. Be really Submissive
This is the whole point. Let your dominant take you over completely. Don't coach or second guess or be critical of your top. Exchange information on your special needs before the scene starts, but once it starts be quiet! If you insist on running a scene to your own specifications, then you should try being a top. You have agreed to limitations of your own power. Stay within those limitations. Respect and obey your top and expect punishment if you don't. Accept it gracefully and cheerfully. Your top has many things to be concerned with, including your safety and what turns you on. Be loyal and dependable and enjoy your role!

9. Be Healthy
D/s-SM, like any strenuous activity, requires that its participants - both active and passive - be in top physical and emotional health. The amount you sleep, your eating habits, your alcohol and drug intake, and everyday stress affect your response and endurance during a scene. Your dominant needs to know when your physical or emotional energy is low. No matter how tempting a scene sounds, an "I want it all now" attitude when you aren't able to give your all will leave both of you feeling let down. You serve your dominant and yourself best by staying healthy!

10. Have Fun
After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasure which comes from responsible, creative D/s-SM play..

-=9 Levels Of Submission =-

Within the S/M subculture, different people use the words "submissive and slave" to mean many different things. When submissives say "I want to be your slave," sometimes they mean only that they want to be tied up and whipped. Many professional dominants routinely refer to their (usually _not_ very genuinely submissive clients) as "slaves." At the other extreme, there are people who want to be full-time personal servants, and who truly want to exist solely for their Dom(me)'s use, pleasure and convenience. And there are many shades in between these two extremes.

1. THE OUTRIGHT NON-SUBMISSIVE MASOCHIST or KINKY SENSUALIST.
Not into servitude, humiliation or giving up control; just pain and/or spiced-up sensuality, on the masochist's own terms and for the masochist's own direct pleasure (i.e. turned on solely/mainly by one's own bodily sensatons rather than by being "used" to gratify one's partner's sadism).

2. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE.
Not into even playing "slave," but into other "submissive" role-playing, e.g. schoolteacher scenes, infantilism, "forced" transvestism. Usually into humiiation, but NOT into servitude, even in play. Dictates the scene to a large degree.

3. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE.
Likes to play at being a slave; likes to feel subservient; may in some cases like to feel one is being "used" to gratify partner's sadism; may even really serve the dominant in some ways, but only on the "slave's" own terms. Dictates the scene to a large degree; often fetishistic (e.g. foot worshippers).

4. TRUE SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE.
Really gives up control (only temporarily and within agreed-upon limits), but gets her/his main satisfaction from aspects of submission other than serving or being used by the dominant. Usually turned on by suspense, vulnerability, and/or giving up responsbility. Doesn't dictate the scene except in very general terms, but still seek mainly her/his own direct/pleasure (rather than getting one's pleasure mainly from pleasing the dominant).

5. TRUE SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE.
Really gives up control (though only temporarily; only during brief "scenes" and within limits) and gets main satisfaction from serving/being used by dominant-but only for FUN purposes, usually erotic. May/may not be into pain. If so, is turned on by pain indirectly, i.e. enjoys being the object of one's partner's sadism, on which the submissive places very few requirements or restrictions.

6. UNCOMMITTED SHORT-TERM BUT MORE THAN PLAY SEMI-SLAVE.
Really gives up control (usually within limits); wants to serve and be used by the dominant; wants to provide practical/non erotic as well as fun/erotic services; but only when the "slave" is in the mood. May even act as a full-time slave for, say, several days at a time, but is free to quit at any time (or at the end of the agreed upon several days). May or may not have long-term relationship with one's Mistress, but, either way, the "slave" has the final say over when she will serve.

7. PART-TIME CONSENSUAL-BUT REAL SLAVE.
Has an ongoing commitment to an owner/slave relationship and regards oneself as the dominant's property at all times. Wants to obey and please dom(me) in all aspects of life-practical/non erotic and fun/erotic. Devotes most of time to other commitments (e.g. job) but Dom(me) has first pick of the slave's free time.

8. FULL-TIME LIVE IN CONSENSUAL SLAVE.
Within no more than a few broad limits/requirements, the slave regards herself/himself as existing solely for the Dom(me)'s pleasure/well being. Slave in turn expects to be regarded as a prized possession. Not much different from the situation of the traditional housewife, except that within the S/M world the slave's position is more likely to be fully consensual, especially of the slave is male. Within the S/M world, a full time "slave" arrangement is entered into with an explicit awareness of the magnitude carefully, with more awareness of the magnitude of power that is being given up, and hence is usually entered into much more carefully, with more awareness of the possible dangers, and with much clearer and more specific agreements than usually precede the traditional marriage.

9. CONSENSUAL TOTAL SLAVE WITH NO LIMITS.
A common fantasy ideal which probably doesn't exist in real life (except in authoritarian religious cults and other situations where the "consent" is induced by brainwashing and/or social or economic pressures, and hence isn't fully consensual). A few S/M purists will insist that you aren't really a slave unless you're willing to do absolutely anything for your Dom(me), with no limits at all. I've met a few people who claimed to be no-limit slaves, but in all cases I have reason to doubt the claim.

-=On Line Protocol=-

NOTE: The following is a general basis for "On Line Rule". Each Dominant/Master will change the rules to His/Her own accord, so please verify each rule with your own so there is no confusion later in time.

Respect is always the #1 rule.

A Dominant/Master is to be greeted first upon entering a chat room, then a submissive, then any non lifestyles.

If a Dominant/Master and submissive are together in a chat room, the Dominant/Master is to be greeted first prior to greeting a submissive.

If a Dominant/Master and submissive are together in a chat room, it is proper for another Dominant/Master to ask permission to speak to the submissive, prior to engaging in a personal open conversation or private IMs.

Prior to sending an IM (instance message or private message) from submissive to Dominant/Master, it is proper to ask in open room for permission to do so and to not send such IM until permission is granted.

It is proper for a submissive to have her/his IM turned off when in a chat room without the Dominant/Master present unless she/he is in a private conversation with one that she has been granted permission to do so by her/his own Dominant/Master in advance.

A submissive shall never show disrespect to her/his Dominant/Master by engaging in a conversation or greeting a male that has not greeted her/his Dominant/Master properly first prior to seeking a responce from her/him.

When using other message programs such as ICQ or MSN for example, it is proper for any other male/female other then the submissive's own Dominant/Master, to seek permission from her/his Dominant/Master to be on a submissive's list.

A submissive never engages in a explicit sexual conversation with a male or female unless in the presents of her/his Dominant/Master with exception to general decisions that take place in lifestyle rooms where one is seeking answers to questions.

A submissive shall always go to her/his Dominant/Master with relationship questions or if she does not have a Dominant/Master , she is to ask such questions in open room and not in a private message with exception to her/his Mentor or Protector.

If a submissive is under protection by a Dominant/Master, it is proper to ask permission of such Protectors prior to engaging in personal conversations or private messages.

Both Dominant/Masters and submissives shall always keep the trust placed in them intact by not placing themselves in a position to be questioned.

A submissive is not to be in a private room without her/his Dominant/Master present or without the permission of the Dominant/Master prior to entering said room.

A submissive is not required to seek permission to enter a room other then by her/his own Dominant/Master as in Gorean lifestyle unless required by her/his own Dominant/Master.

With chat sites that allow linking, a committed submissive shall not link to another male/female without the permission of the Dominant/Master.

NOTE: In some chat rooms it is improper for a committed submissive to speak without permission of the Dominant/Master.


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